I want to fall for someone shy, i want a skinny love

Hello munchokins!

Often we hear people ask us what is our type, do we have a type, who would we want to fall for and normally i tell people i want certain characteristics but lately, i want to fall/ be with someone who is shy, i want to be the cheeky one who makes the other person smile, i want them to have a soft smile when they look at me smiling cheekily at them.

i want a skinny love, i want a playful love, i want someone so vastly different from me that we can make it work.

In my head, i picture someone so vastly different from me. The person ( you) is shy, they keep to themselves a lot and always has their earpiece or headphones in their ear and bobbing their head to the music. You are the cool kind, even tempered and a smile worthy of me turning into a puddle.

I will be the cheeky one who will tease you and when i do that, You  would have this kind of smile while looking away because you are just that shy.

when we go out separately with our friends or i would be engrossed in my book, you would look at me from across the room with this kind of smile till i realize and look at you, making my heart just at the sight of his smile.

you would be the secure one while i will be the insecure one, you will be the calmness to my storm.

And if we ever go out dancing, i want to be the one pulling you to the dance floor excitedly and just grooving with you till our song comes on and i would pull you closer and just wrap my arms around you with our forehead touching.

and we would be singing to our favorite song and just be lost in our own little world and thinking how lucky we both have to share a love that has blossomed from 2 people who are vastly different from each other.

We might have our fights but i want us to last through it.

I would love it also if you were to write me letters because i am a sucker for those.

we would be those couple who doesn’t have to say i love you to prove we love each other, we would say it in those rare moments but we would show it to the world without being too much for others to bear. we would have a skinny love.

OH GOD I AM A HOPELESS ROMANTIC!

but who isn’t anyway, hehehe.

but exceptions differ greatly from reality and i am just hoping one day i would be able to experience this kind of love.

toodle dee you guys!,

xoxo,

M.R

Some who don’t let go,

Hello munchokins!

Now some people don’t let go due to specific reasons and usually we don’t see that. We find these people annoying, irritating and just a past that doesn’t want to be forgotten. They keep popping out and we get very annoyed and we tend to lash out at them. I have been there and i also found out why.

When i published my open letter for the world to see, she would read it and of course came a lot of fights and i had these Fuck It attitude and i honestly could not be bothered until she started pulling my friends into the drama and that just pissed me off. I am like, “DOOOD, your fight is with me not the whole world” and i was in a pretty mad mood for a few days but things changed when i saw her broke down right in front of me. I honestly did not want to have anything to do with her, i was just tired of all this reality drama worthy shit that i just let out a sigh and looked at her.

But something changed when she told me she needed help, she said ” I can’t go on like this, i am so tired”

That snapped something in me, those were the phrase of someone who was falling into depression and i knew what depression could do. Without thinking, i told her she needed help and that i would help her. She was surprised and she asked why i didn’t hate her after everything that has happened.

I just kept quiet and i told her to look into counselling and managed to get the support of her mom who was readily on board. I mean she was worried sick for her daughter.

Lets fast forward a lil bit,

I didn’t see her for a week or two or even three  and she called and asked if we could really talk. Now i hate this word because normally it would lead into a fight but i was curious to see how she was. so we met up and lets be honest here, she didn’t look so great but she was getting better, she had the smile i used to adore and the things is, she is smiling.

A rare sight like a blue moon or an eclipse or a narwhale! That rare!

So we sat and talked and i asked polite questions like ” How are you, how is treatment, are you on medications, are you feeling better ” and she laughed and told me to slow down.

She is on medication, anti depressants and she does weekly counselling and it seems to be helping and she is slowly getting better and we talked about how we both were and she said

” The only reason why i cling so hard was because you were there when my parents broke up, you were there when it was a life changing moment for me, you comforted me and i just could not move on from that. I realized that now, ”

and that actually made sense to me. Every emotion that i have associated her with like anger, annoyance, sadness, irritated ( not sure an emotion or not but yeahhh), they disappeared and i smiled.

Don’t ask me why i smiled but i just did and told her it is a start to recovery, acceptance is a start.

tooodle dee you guys!

xoxo,

M.R

Oh gosh, where do i start?

Hello munchokins!

Since my last open letter and my Starbucks observation journey which i have not wrote about, a lot of thing has happened and i am honestly not sure where to start from.

2015 has proven to be a crazy year so far and i will just start with the starbucks and follow up post will be about other issues and just what has been going on.

So i went to Starbucks for a quick observation because i just wanted to read people’s body and i wanted to go see where i was going with that but was not really interesting cause the place was kinda empty except for a few students studying for god knows what and this man happen to catch my eye. He was the barista and i love how he wears an air of elegance around him, how his hair was backcombed back and love the mini beard or mustache he was keeping, very well trimmed and very neat.

He kinda caught me staring and i had to play it cool and smiled at him which he returned one of course.

so i got bored and started reading my book and then i got distracted then this guy like in the corner caught my attention.

He was talking loudly and people presumed he was angry because my god, he sounded like he just wanted the entire Starbucks and the person he was chatting with to go deaf. I MEAN DOOOD, too loud no?

But as i observe him, he wasn’t angry because his body language was saying things like he was chilling, he was cool and he didn’t mean trouble and he just has a loud voice because when he was ordering coffee, he apologized to the barista and said he was born to be loud.

And i actually giggled when i heard that.

so yeah nothing interesting at all.

Toodle dee you guys!

xoxo,

M.R

Page 24 of 356

it is officially the 24th of January in Singapore and it is 24 days passed new year and my new year resolution and would it be too late if i still wish everyone?

But what not, i am still going to wish everyone

HAPPY NEW YEAR YOU GUYS! MAY YOU HAVE A BLESSED 2015!

Now here is the thing, after the wishing comes the resolutions and might have been pretty much been the same or to say, i never gave much thought of it because i am a fickle minded person and yeah, you know what happens after that but i was on tumblr and i saw this,

2014 was a roller coaster for me. Internship was a bitch but i survived and i am actually pretty thankful for it because it really opened my eyes to what the medical life really was like and now that i am doing FYP, it feels like a desk bond job which i get some people really like but i’m not the kind to sit still.

After since my birthday, things really went downhill from there. I was struggling to keep up with work, life, studies, exam and pretty much everything else then my brother came back out of no where and i had to provide for him as well and it really put much stress on me because i was not earning much but family is family and i would do anything to protect them.

With that being said, i was struggling yet i managed to find joy, my new work. Working in the museum is an eyeopener, i am not kidding. I have seen art in it’s various forms and i always wondered ” What inspires them, can i ever be like them, to proudly hold my own artwork exhibition,”

I wondered a lot honestly and from there, it shaped my new year resolution.

So my NEW YEAR RESOLUTION is simple

– continue my 2014 resolution to get fit and lose weight
– To find joy’s in the little things in every aspect of my life no matter how hard life gets
– To be financially independent
– To stop jumping in head first and take a moment to breathe.
– Spend more time with the family.
– To read 19 books by the end of this year!

And what my friends want me to include,

To curse less and be a better person when playing games and to not drink coffee and get so hyper that by 7pm, i turn into grumpy cat.

On a quick side note,

They most definitely are and just keeping hanging in there!

Toodle dee!

xoxo,

R.

YOU SAY I SAY BIRTHDAY WEEKEND!

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Hello you wonder wonderful wonder people!

On 6-7 December was ma birthday weekend which i of course didn’t go to party, instead i skipped work to spend time with my family because granny’s birthday was on the 6th of December and mine was on the 7th of December so the whole family decide to go for a buffet on the 6th of December and we all had a good time! Well, not really, the food was horrible and the selection was pretty little and not very tasty except for the Laska which still was,

and just before they were closing, the staff surprised me with this!

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i was super duper surprised because it was really unexpected and we go there like every year and i had never gotten a cake from the staff before so this was really a nice change but the problem was i am not a huge fan of cream cake but nevertheless, i chow down on it because it was super nice of them and i really appreciated the effort!

After a filling buffet dinner, we all went to meet my auntie’s first son who is married and already has kids at a nearby Macd because the kids wanted to go playground and you would think the older ones including me to sit out and chill at Macd cafe, you were wrong, we all jumped at the opportunity to play at the playground and brought the little kids with us and we were having fun running around and trying things. This shows just because you are older, does not mean you can’t enjoy yourself and we went back at nearly 12am and i was surprised when the birthday wishes started coming in!

I am the kind of person that does not need the whole world to wish me but only those close to me and i had to unfortunately work on my birthday which was a bummer but it was nice to see familiar faces and the next day was a schooling day and got home from work just to do my Final Year Project log sheet 2 and slept late and woke up early to continue it and i had exams in the afternoon.

And something small and shitty happened but i put that past and my best friend came and  she gave me this!

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It was a Pre-Birthday gift as she told em the actual one was coming at the end of the year but OH MY GOD! IT’S MINT IMPERIALS IN A MASON JAR!!!! I mean what else would you need when you have that and a hand written letter by the people who love you? Well she didn’t give me the calculator and the Asian geographic magazine ( which is mine and it finally came on time!!)

All that happened on Monday and on Tuesday, I received another gift,

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IT IS LIKE A TOTAL OH YESSS! you guys know how much i love innisfree and i literally cannot live without their shampoo because it really does clean the scalp and the little package was from Bayu and there were earrings inside! me love them too! And the box was a patootie pie! It has horses or pony and it was super cute!

And a week before that, Kitty kart, one of my bestfriend came over to my place to hang and i unfortunately got a flu on that day and was sneezing my nose off but before she left, she gave me this!

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No words can express how blessed i am to receive such wonderful and amazing gift from the people i love and cherish! I know i can be a shitty person at times, i curse too much, i nag too much and sometimes i bitch too much but thank you for sticking by me till the very end and surprising me!

I love you guys very muchie!

And that concludes my birthday weekends and surprises!

toddle dee you guys!

HAVE A BLESSED WEEKEND!

xoxo

R.

Short rants : Trust me, if i could hit you, i would

HELLLOOOOOO YOU GUYS!

FRIDAY IS HERE MEANING THE WEEKENDS ARE COMINGGGG!

but that also mean i have to go back to work which is a bummer but it’s fine.

Today short rant would be,

How i wish i could hit people who always try to change my plan!

Let’s get it straight here, i am a very particular person even if i don’t show it. I cannot stand people who keeps trying to change my plan especially when i have set it like a few days ago ( which normally is about a day or two beforehand) and when you tell me to change my plan last minute, you are just asking to be hit

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Like the other day,

i was actually on the way back home and i had already set what time i needed to clear my school work including my project and the next day’s class work but my clever annoying irritating friend decided she urgently needed something from me and kept saying she needed to get it from me and i knew if i were to get down on the bus, i was going to get home late and delay everything but because she was a friend, i gave her a chance or as we Singaporean say, i gave her face and got down and waited for her and guess what, she called and said she didn’t need it anymore and hanged up. NOT EVEN A WORD OF SORRY WAS SPOKEN,

And the other day,

i was rushing home because i was tired and i honestly just wanted to rest and do my Final year project when my mom called and said she needed me to see my auntie and i told her nicely that i had a lot of things to catch up on and i’ll see her tomorrow but she insisted that i see her today and dragged me to my uncle’s place and i ended up not doing anything productive because well, how could i and i don’t normally get annoyed with this because family is family but there would always be a reason why i would suggest an alternative and it is probably because i had shit to do.

The thing is,

And this is really true because some people, not saying everyone expects you to drop the whole world for them while they are not willing to do the same and will end up playing this blaming game with a hint of emotional blackmail. Lets be honest here, everyone has their own things/ shit to do and as much as we want to help you, we have got to help ourselves first and if we don’t, we are the ones suffering, not you sweetie.

so to everyone out there,

unless it is a dire emergency, please please do not alter or try to change someone’s plan last minute because you end up screwing them over and if you really really need to see them or talk to be, ask first and if they really cannot, offer alternative.

We really do appreciate people who are able to do that and of course we will move our things around accordingly.

We are human and we have got to be considerate to one another because if we don’t, we cannot expect people to do the same for us.

anyway,

toodle dee you guys!

xoxo,

R.

Short Rant : Being a little busy bee and loving it

Since the 15 of November, life has taken a dramatic toll.

Just started my part time work and oh my god, i have been busier then ever now. I am rushing through school with 5 modules and Final Year Project and work on the weekends. I am oddly blessed to have found a job that only requires me to work for just the weekends and the best part, i end at 7pm! it is good for me because i get to go home early compared to all my other previous part time jobs but the bad part is i won’t be able to sleep in and i start work at 9:15am.

Yes, i have been a little busy bee but to be honest, i quite enjoy it even though it is tiring. Being able to be feel independent and being able to take charge of your life is an amazing feeling. People always come up to me and ask if i was tired and i tell them i am but i am in control and therefore, i am enjoying it.,

This would probably be the first time ever i am in control of my life and it is exciting because it is such a new feeling and i like it a lot but there is of course a downside to it. i am unable to spend time with my family and it sucks when you don’t get to attend family dinner or family outing and you don’t get to write/ blog as often as you wish. I mean i procrastinate a lot but i do enjoy writing a whole lot

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But to be honest, that is life. You have to give and take even though you wish you could be super women and do everything but honey, we weren’t built like that.

anyway, that’s probably all for now

Toodle dee you guys!

It is already the mid week and the weekends are coming!

HANG ONNNNN!